Teen spirituality: Faith and Doubt night

One of our Christian readers shares a teen-centered idea. The same format could be adapted to any cultural or religious style.

Faith and Doubt Night

teen faith and doubt night“We have a relatively small youth group… maybe 10 high school aged kids if everyone shows up. Faith and Doubt Night has gotten positive feedback from them.  It’s not a typical ‘youth group’ thing. No games, no icebreakers, just a living room full of teens and the senior pastor (no parents), and any questions the kids want to ask. As a parent, I’m not allowed to attend, so my husband and I watch something in the basement while the kids meet in our living room.

“What about this?”

teen faith and doubt nightBecause of the personality, education and demographics of our church, it tends to be rational, intellectual, debate-style, “What about this?’ kinds of questions. The unfairness of hell, the reliability of the Bible, the character of God, injustice in the world, etc. 

We’ve had one so far and the kids really liked it. They thought it was interesting and relevant. After seeing how the first one went, some are now open to inviting friends who have expressed interest in spiritual things.

What parents say

I’ve talked with some of the parents and we mostly agree that most high school kids– whether raised in the church or outside of it– aren’t really sure yet about what they believe. They may give general assent, but they haven’t really kicked the tires and decided what they think for themselves.

How we advertised it

At [church name] we value all honest questions, doubts, and hesitations about the Christian faith. If you are in 9th-12th grade, the floor is wide open for you to bring ANY question you’re wrestling with about Christianity. Pastor Bill will lead conversation as we talk through each other’s questions, and help us think through issues together. Bring your questions. Dessert will be provided.

Got an idea to share with readers? See comment box below.

Tweetable: One of the happiest discoveries for teens can be that asking questions is far more interesting than making statements about their own views. Read about one church’s Faith and Doubt night. Click to Tweet 

Encouragement for spiritually discouraged kids

teen girl discouragedWhat does spiritual discouragement look like in children? No hope for a way out of a tough situation? The faith (or nonfaith) they are growing up with not aligning with what they read, hear, see or feel in school and the world around them? Tired of rituals that do not resonate?

In the depths of their spirit they might hurt because of bad religion or no religion. Maybe a young person is seeking to understand new sensations that “something other” is nearby, hoping, if they focus on that mysterious presence (of God?), it will manifest itself in their life. Or maybe they’re running away from religion or it just doesn’t make sense to them now in their current stage of life.

One man I interviewed gave four ideas for encouraging discouraged kids.

I went to religious schools—one of them in particular stunted the possibility for spiritual growth in me by putting a crabby, nasty, angry, judgmental face on God. They masked God to the point where I could no longer derive comfort from him.

Then another religious school (it was Mennonite, which is not my own faith tradition) dismantled that false, ugly face for me. Through their gentle words and humor and fun and acceptance, they drew me back to the Shepherd.

I cannot overstate what a difference this made to me: If I had continued in the other school I can conceive that it might have taken many years to journey back to the God of love. There is a distinct possibility I would have never returned to a spiritual path that includes the Christian tradition.

laughing girlGentle words, humor, fun and acceptance

Our best friends and our favorite people do all these with us when we’re discouraged! It is the same with children. When we’ve listened without judgment to their distress or doubts and returned gentle words, haven’t we sensed them “melt” into the wonder of being heard and accepted? Humor can relax our discouraged spirits, and sometimes it’s just the fun of letting laughter wash over us that can bring refreshment and a wider perspective.

Tweetable: What does spiritual discouragement look like in kids? And the encouragement they’re looking for. Click to Tweet

Children ask, “Why is Jesus’ birthday a holiday?”

19634_7068 ask for gifts

For young children, Christmas and Halloween are very much alike: one is a time to get presents and the other is a time to get candy. Older children are more likely to hear friends speak of Christmas as Jesus’ birthday, which may give rise to questions about why Jesus is so important that his birthday is a holiday.

I asked some adults this question and here’s what they say:

  • Jesus was a good teacher. We can read the book of Luke in the Bible to learn more about what he taught.
  • Jesus was born, not just as an ordinary baby, but sent by God to show us how to get closer to God and understand better what God is like.
  • Jesus was God’s gift to us, so we celebrate his birthday by giving gifts to each other.

It is not only Jesus’ teachings which make him so remarkable

…although these would be enough to give him a holiday of his own. It is a combination of the teachings with the man himself.

Here’s what Jesus himself said about why he came into the world

1366751_91583540 Bible

  • My purpose is to give you a full and satisfying life.
  • I am the light of the world. If you follow me, you won’t have to walk in darkness, because you will have the light that leads to life.
  • The one who sent me is with me–I always do what pleases him.

Ask children why Jesus’ birthday gets him his own holiday

888971_84558883 joy

Ask them what they think about Jesus and Christmas.  Their answers in this 2 minute video may surprise you, bring you the biggest smile (laugh) of your day, and inspire you to ask them some questions.

Tweetable: Children try to answer simple questions about Christmas in a 2 minute video here. Click to Tweet