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Happy Birthday, 1 year old!
Name Child-Centered Spirituality Date of birth December 9, 2013 Weight Light as a child's heart; Heavy as the meaning of life Length About 300 words per week First steps First reader appeared who was not a family member or personal friend First subscriber signed...
Children ask, “Is Santa Claus real?”
Here's a summary of my favorite approach to answering many questions asked by children: Some people think X Some people think Y Some people think Z [optional] I think Z because___ What do you think? Here is how this approach plays out with Santa... Take a question...
Amazing grace: A spirited girl knew what she wanted
We didn’t say grace at our house when I was growing up because my parents were atheists, explains author Anne Lamott. I knew even as a little girl that everyone at every table needed blessing and encouragement, but my family didn’t ask for it. Instead, my parents...
Scaffolding: It’s not about you
A child's human spirit and conscience develop like a new building under construction with scaffolding around it. Parents and other adults provide a framework for support, but the child is the one under development. The point is the child---or the building. Everybody...
Ask children, “How does God think?”
Talk to any 3- or 4-year-old and you will find a capacity to think about God. Researcher Justin Barrett says, "They already have something like an impulse to think about supernatural beings, to account for why things are the way they are and how things work in the...
Why is hiding wrongdoing harmful?
Hide and Seek can be fun for kids… but the thrill is in being found. No one wants to stay hidden forever. That means they’ve been forgotten and are not part of the group anymore. An (admittedly imperfect) analogy can be drawn to hiding our wrongdoing When...
Tips when children visit the elderly
When I visit my mother in her care facility, I see how children lift the spirits of the elderly. I've put bold type on a couple of ideas a friend of mine used with her own daughter's visits: I used to pick up my daughter every Wednesday from kindergarten and make the...
Helping children process wrongdoing
I have noticed that very young children are quite honest and open about their wrongdoing. A child who is told to stay in the living room and not come into the kitchen will slide one foot into the kitchen and then look at the adult to see what they will do. The child...
Healthy guilt: Oxymoron or worthy goal?
Guilt is generally a negative term. It’s a feeling heaped on us by others that makes us feel bad and decreases our emotional health. Some of us also heap guilt upon ourselves. It weighs us down. Is there ever a place for guilt? Is it ever helpful? I would say...
Rules: Put them to work for your kids
Our rules for children are tools we use to protect them from the damage that results from violating natural law. Until they grow up to understand and incorporate moral laws into their own minds and hearts, they need our rules. Children easily see how violations of the...
Credit goes to religious parents
These timely observations were made by a man I interviewed about childhood spirituality. Notice that he gives credit to religious parents who step back from their own religious style and methods, but not from their beliefs and convictions. They allow children to...
Credit goes to nonreligious parents
Can you think of a recent situation where you accepted, even supported, something you do not agree with? Some people won't do it ever. Some do it quite readily, while others will do it while admitting it is not easy. Especially when it involves a heavy topic like...
Learn good answers to tough questions
There are no definitive answers to difficult questions, but there are good ones. --Rabbi David Wolpe * As a child’s brain continues to develop, cognitive powers of reasoning and critical thinking interact with their human spirit. Children now test assumptions and...
Children ask: Why doesn’t God make trouble go away?
Sooner or later, every child sees trouble coming into life. Things go wrong. When their questions come up, this perspective-- written in a child's vocabulary-- may help you talk about it. Even as a young child you feel anger, disappointment, grief, pain, loss. You...
See the best in your child’s teacher
"When you search for beauty, it is always found. When you search for meanness, it is always found. The choice is yours." (Dr. Becky Bailey) And choices repeated--I would add--become habits. This school year, look for the best in teachers and administrators. Granted, I...
Human spirit in the classroom
A mother's work is never done. The same could be said of a teacher. In this environment of budget cuts and layoffs, teachers often are called upon to be teacher, nurse, counselor, parent, custodian, judge/jury and cafeteria worker. Entering a new school year, some...
When children ask, “How do you know God is there?”
My interviews reveal that after, “Who is God?” the next most common question kids ask concerns how we know God is there. They ask, “Why can’t I see God?" "How do we know who God is if we can’t see him?" "Where is he and how can you prove it?” Below is a possible...
A description of God that does no harm
How do we introduce God in our conversations with young children? How do we do that in a way that informs, yet leaves the door open to explore and journey and be curious as they grow up? Here is a description of God that may prove useful, written in a child’s...