Offer specific reassurance when kids fear dying

Mar 12, 2018 | trust

reassurance about dying“Even more desirable than being able to die peacefully is being able to live fearlessly.”—Dr. Alex Lickerman. Fear, worry and anxiety are so complex in their origins and in the ways each of us manages these emotions best for ourselves. But as adults, we can adapt and offer two spiritual tools to kids that may be helpful for them in managing their fear of death: 1) loving reassurance, 2) communication with God, others and self. In today’s post, we look at the first of these tools.

Spiritual Tool #1: Loving reassurance of God’s protection from fearing death

In Part 1 of the discussion about children’s fears of dying, we discussed that there are no guarantees of being protected from harm. Bad things happen to good people. But God does offer children protection from fearing death.

Healthy fear protects children

Part of God’s protection is seen in the presence of healthy fear—fear that produces brain chemicals like adrenaline to propel the child out of harm’s way.

Love dispels fear

umbrella of reassuranceAnother side of God’s protection from fearing death is found in the child’s confidence that God’s love is there and love dispels unhealthy fear. “How they choose to perceive a threatening event dictates their response to the situation,” observes Becky Bailey.

Kids might relate to this word picture—God’s love is like an umbrella that can protect them from fear.  Using this spiritual tool can allow children to still see the world as a beautiful place, a friendly place.  They can think about how their family loves them and God loves then. “Love is the very best thing for making fears and worries go away,” Molly Wigand says.

When love increases, healthy thinking, good judgment and peace of mind all improve.

Children who trust in God may find themselves able to live fearlessly, even through the valley of the shadow of death.

Next week: Spiritual Tool #2 — Communication with God, others and self

Tweetable: When children look for reassurance as they face of their fears and worries, spiritual resources can play an important role, in addition to emotional and psychological helps. Here’s one such spiritual resource. Click to Tweet

 

God as a source of security for children

Jun 19, 2017 | Security

At any given age children experience normal fears and anxieties. If a family becomes concerned about a child’s unusually high level of anxiety, plenty of psychological resources exist. But there is an additional, important resource to be found in anchoring children at their core—in their spirit.

We all need a place to take our troubles and fears.

For centuries the Bible has been a reliable source of wisdom and offers a powerful picture of what God is like. In one of it’s most meaningful, familiar passages, the 23rd Psalm, a fearful young man writes his prayer:

“Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”

And much later in the book:  “Give all your worries and cares to God, for God cares about you.”

Laura Turner states, “The admonition not to fear is the most frequently repeated instruction in the Bible.”

What my parents did

At a very young age, my parents gave me the following  words, recorded in Genesis, spoken by God to Jacob: “I am with you and will keep you in all places.” They explained that nothing could separate me from the love of God, even when harm came to me.

“People have choices,” they said, “and some people hurt others, but when bad things happen to you, God is right there with you. God understands, and you will never be alone.”

Time and time again, these words–God is with me and will keep me in all places–comforted, reassured and built my sense of security not dependent upon my circumstances.

Security–a most valuable gift

Through the dangers, disappointments and losses of my life, God remains a steady presence in the depths of my spirit. I speak of this to the children I love so that they can develop a sense of security rooted in the presence of God and of people who love them.

Note: Bible quotes are Psalm 23:4, Genesis 28:15, 1 Peter 5:7

Tweetable:  How my parents instilled a sense of security deep in my spirit that continues to this day. Click to Tweet