Jul 11, 2016 | Nourishment
A grandmother in our blog community shared her birthday request with us. She asked her teenage grandsons (currently in foster care) for a special gift that she would appreciate more than any kind of present — a letter telling her how they feel about her.
She told them that the letter could be short or long, handwritten or emailed. With permission, here are lightly edited excerpts from one boy, meant to encourage each of us as we seek to do the best for the children we love.
Dear Grandma,
From Day One you have been there for my brother and me, never giving up on us. Even if we make mindless decisions, you believe there’s good in us. I couldn’t believe it myself a few years ago. Things have changed a lot between the last 4-5 years, for better or worse, but not you.
You’re still involved in our lives, still reminding us to strive for greatness. I don’t understand how you do it. I truly don’t. Your job as a parent is done; you raised two children already and worked more than half your life. Your hip is not what it used to be and you’re still able to come out to our football games and track meets. You really show us the meaning of family.
We live with people who care for us, sure. They have a role in our lives that’s important. The point is they get paid to house us and provide us with the basic things we need. You never got a thing for what you’ve done for me. It’s a small fact that goes without being said, but it makes all the difference.
I don’t need to remind myself of my situation or my past. My world has had pain in it, has had addictions in it, and it has had hate in it. I regret too many things I’ve done, things that shape who I am today.
But I know what kind of person I want to be, what kind of future I see for myself, and everything I have accomplished already wouldn’t be possible without you. I drive you insane most of the time, but nothing is stronger than the bond we have. Grandma, I will love you forever.
Tweetable: Ask & you shall receive. Smart grandma asks teen grandson for birthday letter instead of gift and wow! Click to Tweet
Mar 7, 2016 | Nurture
School children often learn about historical figures who change their country through their fight against injustice. Mathatma Gandhi, William Wilberforce, Martin Luther King, Susan B. Anthony, Nellie Bly, Tommy Douglas.
Many figures throughout history who have fought against injustice acted out of a deep sense of spiritual direction. They were compelled, so to speak.
Some of those who are children now will grow up to be agents of transformation.
They may not all get written up in the history books of tomorrow, but they can all make a difference in the world around them– in ways both big and small. How can we help them discover the ways God may be calling them to make a difference in their world?
In your context, what opportunities do you see?
- When the child is upset by a particular injustice, I discuss risks and rewards of involvement in the cause.
- I encourage the child to read biographies of historical figures they admire for standing against injustice.
- The child could take part in some local push for change.
- I can model responsible social involvement, such as volunteering, recycling, voting, and being aware of current events.
- When I see the child make a positive difference in their environment– even in a small way– I highlight it and praise them for it.
For one grandmother, it looked like this:
I live in an older neighborhood that has become increasingly run down and dangerous over the years. We used to have a large store nearby, but it got torn down and became an empty lot that was seeing more and more gang activity.
Some of us who have lived here for years planned a meeting to talk about what could be done, and my 16-year-old grandson happened to be visiting when the time for the meeting came around. He tagged along with me, bringing his iPhone so he’d have something to do.
But I noticed during the course of the meeting that he was texting less and listening more.
Based on what he heard, he decided to get involved in bringing change to the neighborhood. He helped clean up the empty lot. He contacted the city councilman for our district to ask for funds to make the area into a small park. He even volunteered with an organization that moved into the area to provide a safe place for kids to hang out after school.
He jokes and tells me that he’s just doing it because it will look good on college applications, but I know better. He knows now that his actions can make a difference– he’s caught the bug for community activism.
Tweetable:
- What adults can do now to guide those children who will grow up to be agents of transformation. Click to Tweet
- How can we help children discover how God may be calling them to make a difference in their world? Click to Tweet
Sep 14, 2015 | Nourishment
The English class assignment was to write a five-paragraph essay about a personal hero. Adrian’s* hero is his grandmother–a friend of mine–who shared the essay. Notice how Adrian’s every point flows from his grandmother’s human spirit… and not a single point flows from material possessions.
“My grandmother will always be my personal hero and she has a lot more super powers than you could imagine.”
Superpower #1 Acts of courage
A hero is not just somebody who saves lives or flies. It is someone who makes a difference with acts of courage, love and positive influence. My grandmother will always be my personal hero because she never gives up on me and always tries to be a positive role model.
Superpower #2 Directs me towards a great future
Last week she told me “what you do today will decide what you do tomorrow.” At first I did not understand what she meant, but she explained it to me in a way I could understand it better. She said if I don’t study this week I will not be ready for the test at the end of the week. That made a lot more sense and I told her I hadn’t thought about that before. She just smiled and I know she only wants me to give thought and peace of mind to everything in my life.
Superpower #3 Never gives up on me
For example, over the past few years I have probably said or done something hurtful to my grandmother that I didn’t mean, but she never quit on me. She only encouraged me to make better decisions.
Sometimes I wanted her to quit on me because I quit on myself and she never did. I can honestly say that without my grandmother I would not be where I am today. She has pushed me in many ways to become a more responsible and respectful person and I am lucky to have her in my life.
Superpower #4 Works on her flaws
When I told her I was going to write an essay about her she blushed and said, “I don’t think of myself as a hero.” This statement only made me want to write the essay more because a hero is humble.
However my Grandma is human and has flaws, but in those flaws is her personality and like a hero she works on those flaws to become stronger and wiser.
*not his real name
Tweetable: No mention of possessions, fame or fortune in this boy’s essay about his personal hero–his grandmother. Click to tweet
