If we work on the assumption that spirituality already exists inside every child, the impact we have on children even in the earliest stages of their development makes such a difference.
Many years ago I was told the story of a baby.
This baby was born to a mother addicted to crack cocaine.The little boy was born with an intense craving for the drug, and quickly went into withdrawal. He was inconsolable, crying and arching his back in pain. His mother was not available to him, as she was going through her own withdrawal.
A group of friends decided to take turns holding that little baby in two hour shifts around the clock. Even as he cried and felt pain, arms were always around him. Even when it looked to those holding him that their arms were having no soothing effect, they still held him. After what seemed like an eternity, all the drugs were out of his system and he was at peace… lying in the loving arms of his caregiver.
What difference do you imagine that made to the baby boy?
What did he learn about God even through unfair circumstances? How did his experiences shape him– even experiences he wouldn’t later be able to remember?
It is well-documented that children learn to trust as physical and emotional needs are met consistently.There appears to be a striking difference in how trust develops in the human spirit.
It is as if there is a full allotment of spiritual trust as children start out, and withdrawals are then made on the trust account.
Spiritual trust and language learning share many properties.
We are born with the ability to say all the sounds of every language. At the point where the brain starts to form speech, we discard the sounds that are not a part of the language we learn.
From this point on we can still learn new languages but the later in life we learn them the more an accent is detectable. (Current research shows that children who learn more than one language at this critical point also create certain other benefits in the brain.)
Young children trust readily.
It’s part of our original blueprint that we possess the necessary trust to be connected with the divine. The human spirit stirs in response to the presence of the divine apart from the influence of external circumstances or people.
Children have no problem believing in what they cannot see.
Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, God, and imaginary friends come to mind.
Yet when a caregiver tells the child there is a tooth fairy and they later discover that there isn’t one, spiritual trust could diminish. When they watch a movie about Santa Claus and believe, only to discover later that is not true, another withdrawal could be taken from the account. Parents know what each of their children can handle.
How can we help keep their spirit’s trust account full?
We respect and honor their trust when we present a description of God that is deserving of their trust. Through our own actions and words we make known that God loves everyone, God knows everything and God cares about us.
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Children start life with a full allotment of trust in spiritual things until we make withdrawals. Click to Tweet
“Trust begins from day one. It develops when a baby’s physical needs are met, so if you are there to feed her, change her and respond to her [cuddle and hold], you’ll begin laying the foundation for a close relationship in later years.” — Catherine Hutter, PhD, clinical child psychologist at St. Louis Children’s Hospital
Infants develop basic trust in others when they are helplessly dependent and their needs are met. Conversely, neglect of needs or erratic meeting of needs makes it difficult for infants to learn to trust. Trust is the basis of all future successful relationships.
What we do in the early years matters
As infants grow and learn to talk, listening to them builds trust. We have all struggled listening to the repetitive and often illogical conversation of toddlers. But as Dr. Laura Markham observes, “The ins and outs of the preschool playground may not rivet you, but communication habits start early. It’s hard to pay attention when you’re rushing to pick up food for dinner and get home, but if you aren’t really listening… he learns that there’s not much point in talking.”
When we listen closely, we get much more than we give. On a good day….amusement, joy, wonder, laughter, love…. and isn’t it the good days we store in our memory?
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With kids and trust, getting there is half the fun! Click to Tweet
It is well-documented that children learn to trust as physical and emotional needs are met consistently.There appears to be a striking difference in how trust develops in the human spirit.
