no bystanders in school communityFor most young people, school and its related activities are the scene of almost all personal involvement with others. You might say that school is a community– the broader environment in which kids find themselves. They can not only have a good experience there, but they can take the initiative to make it a good experience for others.

3 ways students can facilitate positive change in their school community

  1. Approach and include students who are being excluded.
  2. Tell someone who’s bullying or using put-downs that it’s not cool; not something that’s okay here.
  3. Speak to a campus administrator if there’s word of a fight, or if someone has carried a weapon to school.  (Rick Phillips)

As more than bystanders — students can see specific results.

bystander helps studentA Sacramento-area high school administrator shares, “Two of our students engaged in a war of words on Twitter that led one to ponder suicide…. One of our… students intervened by supporting the victim, directing the attacker to stop, and getting help. The student is now getting support. This was a dangerous situation very possibly stopped because of some Safe School Ambassador [students] on our campus.” (Chris Smith in The Press-Democrat)

Care, speak up, right a wrong

Parents share some ideas here that worked for them when children came to them with community concerns.

  • Preschool – When the child sees classmates in distress, encourage hugs or words of comfort. Let them know that they can pass along to others whatever empathetic gestures you’ve been making toward them.
  • Early elementary –  As you listen to the child’s concerns about an injustice or putdown directed at a classmate, first mirror back what you see and hear. Identify your child’s underlying emotion: “You seem angry.”  And finally, move to brainstorming ideas for action: “If that happened to you, what would you want someone to do for you to comfort you?”
  • Older elementary – Talk about the difference between speaking up to get help for a friend in distress and tattling to get someone in trouble. Keep asking for help until someone responds. And always tell me so I can support you.

Tweetable: Safe ways for students to become more than bystanders when their classmates are in distress. Click to Tweet